The impact of addiction reaches far beyond the person abusing substances—it can negatively affect everyone in that person’s life. Among those relationships, family can be most affected. On top of the legal and financial problems caused by addiction, families can experience stress and emotional trauma.
For those in recovery, repairing relationships and rebuilding trust with family takes time, effort, and mutual understanding. The following expert-approved strategies can help you or a loved one rebuild family relationships as part of the recovery process. We’ll also examine the evidence backing the importance of family involvement for those looking to heal from substance use disorder (SUD).
1. Be Transparent
Substance use can lead to patterns of dishonesty that take many forms, such as lying about how much you’ve had to drink or how you’re spending your money. The foundation of rebuilding trust begins with honesty. Julie Keen, In-Home Addiction Treatment (IHAT) psychotherapist at Aware Recovery Care, emphasizes the importance of honesty in her approach to recovery. “I often work with clients on re-establishing trust by encouraging transparency,” she says. “This includes open communication about whether they are still using, and about their commitment to recovery. Without honesty, even sobriety can feel uncertain to family members.”
2. Rebuild Trust Through Actions
It takes more than just promising to change: Showing a commitment to recovery through consistent actions is essential to rebuilding family relationships. Taking your treatment seriously and making progress on your goals shows your family that you’re actively taking steps to recover. The most effective strategies include following through on treatment recommendations, such as:
- Attending therapy
- Participating in a support group
- Providing drug tests or breathalyzer readings
- Maintaining open communication about your recovery process
Implementing these strategies shows accountability and reliability, which are pillars of a healthy relationship.
3. Regulate Your Emotions and Improve Communication
“Effective communication begins with emotional regulation,” says Julie Keen. Managing the intense emotions that arise during recovery, such as frustration, defensiveness, and guilt, is important to having an honest and constructive conversation. Once you’re able to keep these powerful emotions in check, you can start to build your communication skills. There are a few ways to do this, such as:
- Developing active listening skills
- Expressing needs clearly
- Practicing non-defensive responses to concerns or feedback
4. Make Amends
Making amends can foster healing and closure in family relationships. Depending on your approach to treatment, making amends can take different forms. If you’re participating in a 12-step program, amends involve acknowledging harm done, taking responsibility, and possibly working to repair relationships. Outside of a structured program, the process still requires accountability, genuine remorse, and behavioral changes that reinforce trust.
5. Seek Professional Support
It can be incredibly difficult to rebuild family relationships when recovering from addiction, and it’s okay to feel that you can’t do it alone. Family therapy can help ensure that everyone feels heard as you navigate the intense discussions that arise during recovery. It is also proven to be an effective part of SUD treatment.
According to a 2020 study, couple and family-based therapies provide benefits for people with SUD as both the exclusive treatment or as part of a multicomponent SUD treatment program. Another study found that involving significant others of people with substance use disorder in therapy led to a 6% reduction in substance use overall compared to those who only underwent individual therapy; this translates to 2 fewer drinking days per month or 3 fewer drinking weeks per year.
If you’re interested in an addiction treatment program that involves family support, Aware Recovery Care can help. Our approach to recovery engages the entire family through identifying a family ally, involving a Family Education Facilitator to explain what to expect from treatment and how families can best support their loved ones, and providing Family Systems Therapy if appropriate. Contact a Recovery Specialist today and learn more about how Aware can help rebuild your family relationships.
Recovery is a journey—one that doesn’t have to be walked alone. With honesty, consistency, emotional awareness, and professional support, families can heal together and create stronger, healthier connections.
